Date : Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Time : 9/30/2009 06:02:00 PM
Title : The World of BITCHES.

Hello, these few days' been okay. Exam starts tomorrow. Shit. Late today. Shitter. Had to run. I hate it.. However, it made me realised one thing today. My stamina is getting worse & im getting fatter & fatter each day. Dang. Think i gotta start going for daily running after exams at the garden downstairs already uh :D

Well, I created a chinese blog yesterday. It seems retarded, but yeah.. Trying to improve me chinese if possible :X Haiz. Yesterday was really a little tiring physically & emotionally. Slept without switching off the lights again.. Electricity bill is sure to go up.. Blahblah. In school was okay. Then came home, and wanted to study, but switched back to my lazy pattern.. Slacked the whole afternoon & even used the time for studying to create that dumb chinese blog. Im quite proud of it though. Heh..
In the evening, went out to buy my dinner.  Came back & was ready to have my dinner when some bitch came asking me for his number. I didnt know why i was so afraid to let her have his number. I just felt like i needed to protect him & that i cant lose him, for the fact that i still cant face up to the reality that he already has someone else in mind. In the end, she got it from someone else & i was unhappy & argued with her. I communicated with that someone via sms. That someone told me everything she said. That someone told me that the bitch said that she had already deleted the number. Fine, I let it go since that bitch said that she had deleted the number already. Today, that someone asked him if some unknown numbers msged him. He said yes and it was that bitch. F. That liar. Such a hypocrite. I HATE HER!
Obviously i didnt eat in peace. I was just so scared, scared that i would lose him. This kind of feeling... is so... so hard to describe. Not many have felt this way before. Seriously, i have never felt this way before in the past either. He is like the first one who made me feel that way. I know i have to face the music someday.. I just dont know if i can give him up. Or perhaps, he would still be in my mind... 5 years, 10 years, 20 years or maybe even forever & ever? Im really afraid that he would leave me someday & that he is together with someone else. Even now, i try not to look at him & avoid him. But, i would just subconsciously steal looks at him & quickly turn back, making sure he is fine. Haiz. URGH.

After school today, i met another bitch. She thinks she's just so popular? Mind you, she's just a bloody FOLLOWER of that popular group. Give people faces, attitudes, backstabbing? BITCH. Shouting at senior citizens is her forte. She just never realises how rude that is & she thinks she's pretty? DREAM ON, BITCH. The sight of her irks me. Her voice & behaviour disgusts me further. EEW. I dont understand why so many idiots choose to be her friend. To think i was one of the idiots before! She is influencing so many idiots to become popular bullies/bitches. PLEASE STOP IT LUH BITCH.

This world is full of bitches. Some good, some bad.. Well, think my blood pressure's going up uh. Guess i'll just stop here.

Byebyes. Takecares.

Lalalalala.
Cheryl.
30.09.09 (Wednesday)

** I never mentioned who it was. If you think it's you, you must have a guilty conscience? Wahahahaha. Dont anyhow spam people's blog uh. If you know it's you, or if you are her friend(s), jolly well keep your comments to yourself! Stop your backstabbing & shits. It sucks, totally. 

* I cannot face the reality. I feel so hurt when i know i will lose you. I want to protect you so so so much, so that you can stay by my side. But i know that's impossible..

  
 P.S. Im sorry if i used vulgarities. I was too agitated. SORRY.

Date : Saturday, September 26, 2009
Time : 9/26/2009 02:05:00 PM
Title : BROKEN.

Hello peeps, since im using the computer, guess i might as well post a little... As usual, many things happened, but this week seems to be quite okay for me. Tests tests tests.. There were actually 6 tests in a week. ENGLISH, CHEMISTRY, BIOLOGY, PHYSICS, AMATH, EMATH. Haiz.. Im going bonkers. The following few weeks will be worse. Im so NOT looking forward to exams. Counting down, about 9 days or so. Urgh.

He made his point. He told me to find someone else. He said NO, he never felt that way for me, & i guess he will never EVER. Hurt, i cried for the night that day. I felt so confused. A mixture of feelings. I felt for a moment that i had lost someone special & important in my life.. I sent him a last message. I wished him all the best & that i would give up on him & that time heals, so he didnt have to worry. Maybe it was fated that it was the last message i will send him.

The next day... BLOODY HELL. I went to IKEA. My phone was in my pocket the WHOLE time. As you know, there are many beds in IKEA...... They looked so soft & comfortable.. So i jumped, i Jumped, & i JUMPEDDD... So happily.. Then went for dinner at the eating place... I sat down. I felt "something" was missing.. SHIT. Lost my phone. Went to search for it.. Conclusion : LOST.
F. I couldnt believe my luck man. After losing someone special, now i lost something important. Using a really retarded phone now!!!

Monday was a public holiday. I went to Plaza Singapura to replace my SIM card with the same number. However, all my contacts = lost. Had to start from scratch again. Whatever luh. At least my number remains^^ After that, had Sakae teppanyaki. Nice. Shiok.
Then went to Orchard Ion, finally for the first time!

Next day, supposed to go to school. What the heck, damn sway. Alarm clock didnt ring. DL luh! Was late already. So didnt go to school. Spend $23 just to get a MC. Wakao. Teacher like kept calling. I was soooo guilty that i did not dare to pick up her call. Haiz.. At that time, heart was so itchy.. Heh.. Spent my whole day at home watching televesion. I know i wasted alot of time. That was why i felt 2x GUILTY. Haiz.

Wednesday, went back to school. When i saw him, i didnt know how to face him. I avoided & avoided & avoided. I dont know how to get close to him anymore. But when i saw the happy smiles on his face, i felt happy for him too. At that point, i was thinking 'Wish you happiness & joy.' Seriously, i want him to be happy. 真心的祝福.

Thursday, had split personality luh. Was smiling & laughing in school. The moment i reached home, my mood changed drastically.I felt a sudden sadness in me, perhaps its what you call "LONELINESS". Then was okay later on. Secretly used the laptop to send him an email. Whether he sees it or not, God knows. Then mom came home. The laptop was warm. She knew i used it. She asked me, but i denied. Die die also deny. Shit. I did something bad again T.T

Yesterday, i felt so guai (乖).. In class, quite attentive. After class, after eating, went home for tuition. After tuition, after dinner, automatically took out my Physics textbook & started revising. o_o What happened to me? Ready to turn over a new leaf? Or... just keeping myself busy to forget all unhappy things?? I dont know. Haiz.

Okay, think i should stop here & go study. Exam's really nearing & im starting to panic. Wooooo~

Byebyes. Takecares.

Lalalalala.
Cheryl.
26.09.09 (Saturday)

** Good luck all for EOY^^ Do leave me your names & contact number when you see me. Thank you thank you.

* I set my mind to give you up. I will, as time flies. Time is everything.    

Date : Thursday, September 17, 2009
Time : 9/17/2009 06:23:00 PM
Title : When will all these end?

When will all these end? When?! When are those people gonna stop their nonsense? Havent they realised that they have hurt many people? Im not only talking about 1 group, its all the stupid stupid cliques. People insulting people, people criticizing people.. Arent we all people?  We are the same kinds, isnt it? No matter how bad, or how good people are, arent we still people? People should live in peace, in harmony, together... Right?

Haiz... so many problems. How i wish all this would just end instantly. Im tired of being the middle person, im tired of sitting on the fence. If i help you, i gotta help her. I want all this to stop. PLEASE. I have to make a choice- Between who my real friends are & who are not. I try to figure out myself, who exactly i am. I just cant judge myself. What is my character like? All i know is that i need friends who are sincere, truthful & loyal.

HOW I WISH. This is seriously the worst time of my life. I wanna quickly get out of it. Haiz.. Im really tired these few days. No matter how early i sleep, i will still feel sleepy. Exams is just like 2 weeks away from now. I really gotta start panicking & studying. I dont wanna do badly again T.T But i dont seem to be taking any actions.. Perhaps i wont be blogging for the time being until exams are over.

He* still keeps me in suspense. Who exactly is the one he* likes? He* claims she may not be beautiful in others eyes, but she is indeed DAMN beautiful in his* eyes. Who is she? What a lucky girl... I told him* i would give up, but is that really what i want and what i would do? I dont know.

Haiz, think i shall just end off here. Nothing else to type. So..

Byebyes. Takecares.

Lalalalala.
Cheryl.
17.09.09 (Thursday)

** All the best to all for EOY exams. Work hard & we can play hard after that(: & i hope everything turns for the better. A reminder to myself: I go to school to study, to learn & not get myself into deep shit.

* It's hard. Please stop keeping my in suspense. Just let me know who she is so that i can have a peace of mind. PLEASE. No matter what, i guess, you'll still be in my mind for the time being.. <3

Date : Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Time : 9/15/2009 06:50:00 PM
Title : THE GREATEST FEAR: OUTCASTED.

Well, havent been blogging for a few days & many things just happened in a flash. I know, & i realised before that i dont have any true friends, or rather, just friends. This feeling, is really horrible - when you find out that you have been cheated by your friends all along, backstabbed,etc. It sucks, totally.
Im not sure, just so not sure if i should confront her. She's such a ...... I took her as a friend. I gave her many chances, & what the heck. She'd been lying to me, for so long & i never realised it. Should i blame it on my stupidity? Or should i blame her? Damn it. If i confront her, i would have no one to go for recess with me.. Hell. I mean, i dont take her as just a dog, or whatever it is... But she's like the only one who is willing to go with me. At this point in time, i really feel so outcasted!!! I have no friends, no buddies, no confidants!!! Nothing... Im left with nothing. Who will be willing to be my friend?? I just need true friends, i just dont want to be outcasted. It's my greatest fear...
What have i done wrong? I never betrayed anyone, i thought i was kind, i thought i was friendly, i thought... etc. Being nice, is that a crime? Why is it that the kinder one is, the more detested she is? WHY? I just want to have someone or some people i can 'CLICK' with... Perhaps it's fated i should lead the life of a loner.. I dont know. I've changed a lot, haven't i? I thought my attitude is so much better than in the past, isn't it? Oh GOD, why is this happening to me? I haven't been hypocritical, i treat everyone truly & sincerely, but no one sees me, no one notices.. Even if they did, they would notice my flaws, yeah? Maybeit's just that i think too much, & that im too pessimistic.
DEAR FRIENDS, WHERE ARE ALL OF YOU? I hate the feeling of being outcasted. Really. I dono how to face her anymore, i cannot face a liar.. It really pisses me off, to think i have a friend like that. Sigh. Now all i hope is that everything will turn for the better. I'll try not to be too overwhelmed with sadness.. Although i have been outcasted by my friends, i think i have not outcasted myself yet. I believe that my luck will change. I wont be that unlucky everytime, I HOPE.
Many homework nowadays, exam's nearing... Sigh. I try to pay attention in class these days.. Anyway, many thanks to those who still take me as a friend & i hope more friends will come by.
Lalalalalala.
Cheryl.
15.09.09
** Thanks to those who take me as a friend, really, thanks. TO HER: I hate liars.
* I hope im your friend uh, for i treat you as one. A TRUE FRIEND. I love you.

Date : Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Time : 9/09/2009 03:54:00 PM
Title : 090909

Today is the 9th of this month- which makes it 090909. Lucky day? GOD knows xD OMG. I'm suddenly reminded of End-Of-Year examinations. It's is less than a month away! Shit. I havent been mugging lately... I guess it's time to get started.
Hell, i've been given holiday homeworks, but i havent even started on them! It's alot & im only left with about 4 days to get things done. Really dont feel like doing, but i doubt i have a choice.. Sigh, been doing nothing these 2 days other than watching TV, eating & staring at the computer screen..
Okay, guess im gonna start with my first holiday homework later on TODAY. I must make sure i get it done. Supposedly, there should be NPCC today.. Didnt go, for some unacceptable reason.
Dont really know what to type.. Nothing is coming into my mind. HELP~ D:  Shall stop here then... Sigh. It's getting boring. Shall update tonight if there's anyything to type about.. So for now...
Byebyes. Take cares.
Lalalalala.
Cheryl.
09.09.09 (Wednesday)
** Nothing really much to post these few days.. Guess im gonna have a shower now. I STINK xD
* URGH. I love you, i love you not, i love ... ... Sigh. So much to tell you, yet i feel so shut-up. 

Date : Monday, September 7, 2009
Time : 9/07/2009 05:54:00 PM
Title : What rights do you think you have?

I shall just start...
I shall name this person M..
To M: It just got me wondering suddenly.. Why do you keep blogging about people & scolding them there? Seriously, did people even offend you? I chanced upon your blog earlier.. From what you described i felt as it it was most probably me.. I cannot be sure, but i feel kinda weird.. Just wanna let you know uh, go & look at your own english uh. The way you blog... HAH! Using difficult words, trying to copy who? You dont even know the exact meaning of words & yet you dare to flaunt them. You know how stupid that looks? Im dont care if you wanna talk bad about me, blog about me, blahblahblah. It's just you & you using your PEABRAIN. Go ahead & do so! I just dont like the way you talk about people. It sucks. Your attitude, is worse. Roll eyes, shouting, acting bitchy, etc. Just who do you think you are? FYI, im not scolding you.. Im just giving you a piece of advice. STOP TALKING BAD ABOUT PEOPLE BEHIND THEIR BACKS. A blog is for your emotions, you thoughts & daily life. NOT FOR SCOLDING PEOPLE. Get it?

I must have been blind to be M's friend once! Yuck. Anyway, today went to mangrove swamp at Sungei Buloh.. It was worse than i expected. Eeeww.. The mud.. It was like quick sand.. You could literally sink into the mud.. Gross.. My precious shoes, turned all black & muddy. Squish squish squish.. Sounded so disgusting.. Great experience though.. In the mud, there were snails, slugs, shrimps, crabs, etc. There was even chutchut & dua tao! After that saw a type of reptile on a platform. It was larger than my dog at home!! It was the monitor lizard or something like that.. I actually mistook it for a crocodile! xD Then had lunch back at BoonKeng Mac.. Then went home & slacked...............

So tired. Thank God it's the holidays now.. But for me, hols = no hols this term again. Sigh.. I need to take a break. Very soon is exams already.. Sigh.

Byebyes. Takecares.

Lalalalalala.
Cheryl.
07.09.09(Monday)

** Not much comments. Just, think about what rights does one have to comment on the others?

* You may ignore me. I can take it that your presence is no longer there.. But you will always be at the bottom of my heart. The one & only you.

Date : Sunday, September 6, 2009
Time : 9/06/2009 02:30:00 AM
Title : You Belong With Me LYRICS.

This song has a rather great meaning.. I like it quite alot.. So yeah, enjoy!!



YOU BELONG WITH ME
You're on the phone with your girlfriend, shes upset.
Shes going off about something that you said
'Cuz she doesn't, get your humor like I do...
I'm in the room, it's a typical Tuesday night
I'm listening to the kind of music she doesn't like
and she'll never know your story like i do
But she wears short skirts
I wear T-shirts
She's cheer captain
And I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day when you wake up
And find what you're looking for
has been here the whole time
If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
been here all along so why can't you see, you
You belong with me
You belong with me
Walkin' the streets with you and your worn-out jeans
I can't help thinking this is how it ought to be
Laughing on a park bench, thinking to myself
Hey isn't this easy
And you've got a smile that could light up this whole town
I haven't seen it in a while since she brought you down
You say you're fine
I know you better then that
Hey whatcha doing with a girl like that
She wears high heels
I wear sneakers
She's cheer captain and
I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find
That what you're looking for
has been here the whole time
If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along so why can't you see
You belong with me
Standing by and waiting at your back door
all this time how could you not know
Baby....
You belong with me
You belong with me
I remember you drivin' to my house
in the middle of the nightI'm the one who makes you laugh
When you know you're about to cry
And i know your favorite songs
And you tell me about your dreams
Think I know where you belong
Think I know it's with me...
Can't you see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along
So why can't you see
You belong with me
Standing by and waiting at your back door
All this time
How could you not know
Baby you belong with me
You belong with me
You belong with me
Have you ever thought just maybe
you belong with me
You belong with me...

NICE!!(:

Date :
Time : 9/06/2009 01:47:00 AM
Title : You Belong With Me-

Finally, the amazing race is over. How great, my group came in last. If not for SasiKumar, i think we could have reached earlier! HELL. Anyway, glad that it's over. All i hope now is that Oh Tze Ming can keep his words.. Sigh.

Yesterday, after the race, we were dismissed. That was when i started to feel lonely all of a sudden. At that moment, i just felt as if i had no friends. Not even a single one.. But i came to realise that it was me.. I was feeling unwell again. Felt like vomitting & was so giddy. So i decided to go home first while the rest had dinner with Miss Ang.
After these few days bonding with Miss Ang & the guides people, i feel much closer to them. I feel happier.. Perhaps it because when im with them, i feel like there are finally people there to appreciate me :x Yeah yeah, blahblah. Miss Ang wanted to give all of us who helped out a treat, but i guess not. I turned down the offer.. I appreciated the offer, but nah.. it's alright. Besides, im going for some mangrove guide nonsense on Monday. So i wont be able to make it.

Anyway, showed mom report book. Surprisingly, she didnt scold me for anything because i came up with a super duper excellent excuse : " AT LEAST MY GRADES IMPROVED. EXCEPT FOR CHEMISTRY & PHYSICS. " But she is still reluctant to return me my w705! SHIT.

Whatever uh. This morning, i woke up with muscle aches on my arse.. & suffered from stiff neck & back xD I could sense my butt muscles getting fitter! Woohoo~ I had fishball noodles for breakfast, didnt have lunch, ate lots & lots of nonsense, watched TV, went grandma's place, had dinner. I practically lazed around the whole day.. Came home, watched a movie on Disney Channel--Cadet Kelly acted by Hillary Duff. Nice show.. I watched it twice already. Oh well, its nice, yeah, so WHO CARES?? xD I feel tired now although slacked whole day through.. Guess im gonna sign off soon anyway..

Actually, i didnt feel like blogging these few days. Feeling real LAZY.. But since i was adding a new song for the blog, i might as well blog.. I was surfing the internet earlier. I wasnt sure what happened, but i ended up looking for Taylor Swift's songs.. I've heard a few before, but i had the intention to check out others.. Then i found this song sung by her: You Belong With Me. I think this song describes me pretty well.. So i added it as the main song.. Hope you guys & he will like it..

I sort of miss him*again & again. Sigh, it's late, im tired. I shall sign off here then.

Byebyes. Takecares. Goodnight.

Lalalalala.
Cheryl.
05.09.09 (Saturday)


** Thanks to the members of guides who put in tremendous efforts in this amazing race. Special thanks to Miss Ang, Jeanette, Regina, Vanessa, Alex Chia, Liling, Khiddee, Jaya, etc. Without you guys, the race wouldnt be successful. & Congrats to winning group uh!!! (:

* Standing by and waiting all this time. How could you not know? I miss you. You told me you like someone else. You never knew that my heart 'shattered" into pieces when i heard that. It is hard to accept. But if it is her*, I'll lose happily, for she's* definitely MUCH MUCH MUCH better than me.. Again, if that's the case, then all the best.

Date : Thursday, September 3, 2009
Time : 9/03/2009 11:18:00 PM
Title : if that's the case, then all the best.

Another day has passed.. My flu's much better now.. Thanks to all those who cared to even ask.. Love you guys :D Sigh.. Tomorrow's the amazing race. Will be taking a squad SOLO. I wonder how it would be..

Today had last minute preparations for tomorrow's race. Stayed in school till like 7.30pm then headed home. Had KFC for dinner.. I messaged him* today and he* replied.. Finally! I missed him* so much! I told & asked him* many things today.. & im glad i did. I let my heart out.. He* told me he* liked someone whom i know, keeping me in suspense. Sigh. He* told me he* mentioned he* liked the girl before & the only person i can think of is WL... I narrowed the number of girls in our class down to 10, but i still couldnt figure out who it was D: I can think of a few possible ones.. But apparently, he's* not replying now, again. T.T
Sigh, i guess there's no hope for me.. The one he* likes isnt even me. Why is it so hard just to let him* off my mind? Why did i fall in love with him* in the first place? WHY?

Well, nothing else to say for today. Havent packed school bag.. & i don wanna get insomnia again xD So i guess it's

Byebyes then. Takecares.Goodnight.

Lalalalala.
Cheryl.
03.09.09(Thursday)

** Yay! I passed my NAFPA test.. Finally, i can do 3 incline pull-ups. Thanks Fatty Seah. :D

* I can do nothing about it.. Just think i should 默默地替你加油打气. Ganbatte! Im ready to hear your answer. Tell me, when YOU are ready. I miss you.

Date : Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Time : 9/01/2009 01:27:00 PM
Title : FLU BUGS ATTACK!!!!!!

URGH. Im down with a bad flu... Feeling weird, tired. Nothing much to post. Today is a holiday-Teacher's Day. Hope the teachers have a good break today, before returning to work to handle the disastrous class :D Yesterday went to East Coast Park for the X-country thingy. It was like so boring... After that went to Parkway Parade with Wei teng to have Sakae Sushi(:

It's raining now.. Im feeling like so dizzy everytime i stand up. Woo~ Sniff sniff.. T.T Not gonna continue posting, just very tired. So..

Byebyes. Takecares.

Lalalalala.
Cheryl.
01.09.09(Tuesday)

** Happy Teacher's Day!

*I miss you*.